Remember (On Hiatus)
by Neon Elephants
Summary: Tris becomes the first person to survive a fall into the chasm. (This takes place after initiation and there is no war) I'm terrible with summaries. Hopefully, the story is better. Please check it out!
1. Chapter 1

**Tris**

A microphone screeches somewhere so loud that I have to cover my ears. Looking across the room I see Eric standing on one of the tables with a microphone in his hand, tapping it with his fingertips. Once everyone has gone quiet he clears his throat and begins speaking.

"We aren't big on speeches here," He says, "Eloquence is for the Erudite," He says and the crowd laughs. I roll my eyes. I wonder how many of them actually know that he, himself, was an Erudite before transferring here to Dauntless. If they knew that, I doubt they would laugh at his stupid joke, "So, I'm going to keep this short," He says, "It's a new year and we have a new pack of initiates. And a slightly smaller pack of new members. We offer them our congratulations."

At the word 'congratulations' the entire room erupts, not into applause, but into cheers and the pounding of fists on tables and the stomping of boots on concrete. The noise vibrates in my chest and I grin.

"We believe in bravery. We believe in taking action. We believe in freedom from fear in acquiring the skills to force the bad out of our world so that the good can prosper and thrive. If you also believe in those things, we welcome you," Even though I know Eric probably doesn't believe in any of those things, I find myself smiling, because I believe in them. No matter how badly the leaders have warped the Dauntless ideals; those ideals can still belong to me.

More cheers and pounding fists and stomping feet.

"Tomorrow, in their first act as Dauntless members, our top ten initiates will choose their professions, in the order of how they are ranked," Eric says, "The rankings I know, are what everyone is really waiting for. They are determined by a combination of three scores. The first is from the combat stage of training; the second is from the simulation stage; and the third is from the final examination. The fear landscape," He says, "The rankings will appear on the screen behind me."

The names appear on a large screen behind Eric. It is almost as large as the wall itself. I watch as the rankings appear and see my name and picture in the number one spot. I feel lighter, like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I didn't realize I was so weighed down until that second. I smile and a tingling feeling spreads through me.

First. Divergent or not, this faction is where I belong. I look down the rest of the names to see who else made it through.

Tris

Uriah

Lynn

Marlene

Peter

Will

Christina

Eight, nine, and ten are Dauntless born kids I don't know. I don't even recognize their names.

Christina and Will made it and that's all that really matters. As long as I have my friends here with me I'm fine. Will wraps his arms around me and gives me a bear hug before turning to Christina whose eyes are filled with tears. They are talking to each other, but it is so loud in here now that I can hardly hear anything.

I am startled when someone grabs me from behind and shouts in my ear. It's Uriah. I can't turn around so I reach back and squeeze his shoulder.

"Congratulations!" I shout over all of the noise.

"You beat them!" He shouts back. He releases me, laughing, and runs into a crowd of Dauntless-born initiates. They are extremely rowdy. I'd probably be knocked out if I were over there 'celebrating' with them.

I look back up at the screen again. The initiates ranked 11 and 12 are Molly and Drew. Drew who tried to run while Peter held me by my throat over the chasm, and Molly who fed the Erudite lies about my father, are Factionless. It isn't quite the victory I wanted, but it's a victory nonetheless.

All around me is the pounding of Dauntless fists. Beside me Christina and Will are kissing a little too sloppily for my taste. There is a tap on my shoulder and I turn to see Tobias.

"Do you think giving you a hug would give way too much?" He asks.

"You know, I don't really care," I stand up on my tiptoes and press my lips to his. I wrap my arm around his neck and run my hand through his short brown hair and press my left hand to his cheek. I can feel the stares we are getting as people start to fall silent around us. Too soon he pulls away and I can tell that he notices the stares too from the redness tinting his cheeks. Not many people care to acknowledge us though, due to the loud cheering for the initiates. I do, however, notice my friends' faces. Christina's in particular.

"What the hell?!" Christina practically shrieks, "When did this happen and why was I not informed?" She asks more calmly. I look up at Tobias who still has his arms wrapped around me. He shrugs, "How long has this been going on?" She asks.

"Uh…since stage three-ish," I tell her, "I couldn't exactly tell people. I didn't want you all to think it was favoritism," I say.

"Do you really think I would have thought that?" She asks completely ignoring Will now, "It was pretty obvious that you two had some sort of feelings for each other pretty early on," Christina says.

"How early on?" I ask.

"I don't know," She shrugs, "There were just times when it was very noticeable that you two have the hots for each other," She says nonchalantly.

"It's true," Will says from his spot at the table. I glare at him and he holds his hands up, "Just telling it like it is."

"Okay, well, I have to go find Zeke. He said he wants to have a party later to celebrate," Tobias says, "I am going to try to talk him out of having it by the chasm. I don't think having a bunch of drunken people by the chasm is a great idea," Will and Christina laugh at this probably remembering when he was drunk by the chasm and started flirting with me. That wasn't such a bad day.

"Alright, I guess we'll see you later then," I say. Tobias places a kiss on my cheek before taking off to find his best friend. When Tobias is out of earshot, Christina squeals and pulls me into a tight, bone crushing, hug, "Chris, you're killing me here," I choke out and she lets go.

"Sorry," She apologizes, "I'm just excited for you," She says, "Four is hot," I roll my eyes, "And I'm sure he's nice and stuff…to you," She says. I look over to Will who only shrugs.

"Did I just see you and Four _kissing_?" I hear Uriah's voice behind me, "I asked him if I saw what I saw, but he wouldn't answer me," He says.

"They were," Christina says, "And just so you don't have to go through the trouble of trying to get it out of her again, they have been seeing each other since 'stage three-ish'," She tells him with the air quotes. He nods as he tries to keep up with her speed talking, "Have they figured out what they're doing about the party yet?" She asks Uriah.

"Well, Four is trying to convince Zeke to take the party up to his apartment, but Zeke wants to keep it down here," Uriah shrugs, "I guess we'll see how that works out," He says.

"Okay, then, we need to go," Christina links her arm through mine before speaking again, "We need to go get ready," She says. I groan, "Oh, hush," She shushes me and the two of us walk out of the dining hall and back to the dorms.

…

Christina left for the party before me. She actually finished getting ready before I did. Probably because I couldn't find anything to wear. She has a lot more clothes than I do. Tobias had convinced Zeke to move the party up to his apartment so she and Will are meeting Uriah, Marlene, and Lynn in The Pit so they can take them up there. Chris and Will have no idea where the apartments even are right now. We don't get our apartments until after we pick our jobs tomorrow.

I end up changing into a pair of black skinny jeans and a black, lace, blouse. Christina set out a pair of shoes she wanted me to wear, which I'm not too sure about. They are black, wedge, boots and aren't very comfortable. And I'm sure they aren't going to be very comfortable to walk in. After adding some makeup I leave the dorms and start making my way to the apartments.

I know how to get to the apartment. I've been to Tobias's twice, though the first time I don't really remember getting there. I was sort of, half way, passed out. I will just have to figure out which one is Zeke's. I'm sure it won't be hard to figure out since there will be a party going on.

As I am walking toward the apartments, I run into Peter as I am walking near the chasm.

"Fancy meeting you here," Peter says. I roll my eyes, "Where are you headed all dressed up like that?" He asks looking me up and down. I feel gross and want to go back to the dorm to change, but know I don't have the time.

"That isn't any of your business," I reply trying to keep calm and get around him. The last time we were in this spot he assaulted me and tried to throw me over the railing and into the chasm.

"I bet you're going to see your boyfriend," He says, "I mean, Four is your boyfriend, right? Or was that someone else you were kissing at the banquet?" He asks. I don't reply, "I'll take that as a 'yes'," He continues. There is a pause and I try to get past him, but he won't let me, "So, you were sleeping with our trainer? That's why you got those high rankings?"

"I wasn't sleeping with anybody," I snap, "You have no idea what you're talking about."

"Okay, fine," He says, "Then how come Four beat the shit out of Drew?" He asks.

"That has nothing to do with the rankings," I reply, "Well, actually it does. You guys were angry because I ranked higher than you so you decided to assault me and then try to kill me," I say.

"We were just trying to scare you," Peter says before grabbing onto my arm tightly. His fingers gripping me so hard that I know there will be bruises later. He drags me over to the railing and I see a shadow of someone about to round the corner. I hope to God that it's Four, but it's not. It's Eric. Awesome.

"What are we doing over here?" He asks and stops beside Peter.

"He's-" I start to speak, but Peter smacks his hand over my mouth so I can't talk.

"Y'know I don't really think it's fair that she was ranked first when she was dating our trainer," Peter says to Eric, "I mean, how do we know that he wasn't just giving her a high rank because of their relationship or whatever?" He asks Eric, rhetorically.

"Well, I guess we could do something about that," Eric replies.

"What, kick her out?" Peter asks, hopefully.

"No, I don't have the authority to do that," Eric says, "Only Max can do that. But maybe we can give her a test of sorts," He shrugs.

"What kind of test?" Peter asks with a confused look on his face. Eric looks at the railing and then at the chasm and back to the railing.

"Get her over the railing," Eric says. I start to kick and scream into Peter's hand, "The more you resist the harder it will be," Eric tells me. I don't listen. I just continue to kick and scream hoping they won't be able to get me over. After a minute, Eric grabs my legs and helps Peter to get me over the railing, "You might want to grab onto something," Eric says and drops me abruptly.

I quickly grab onto the bottom of the railing and wrap my arms around it. I can feel the water from the river below splashing up against my arms making it hard for me to hold on. It is soaking the bottom of my pants and silent tears start pouring from my eyes. My entire body begins to shake from the bitter cold water splashing on my arms and legs.

"Get me back up there!" I shout. My voice is shaky from the shivers running through my body. Peter and Eric just stare down at me. My fingers are going numb and I can feel my hands starting to slip.

"We'll pull you back up in a few minutes," Eric says, "Just relax. It's not like you're dying or anything. Stop being such a drama queen."

I continue hanging from the railing for another 30 seconds or so when I hear the clicking of heels on concrete. I see a flash of red and then I hear Christina's voice.

"Have you two seen Tris?" She asks, "She was supposed to meet me a while ago and I haven't seen her since I left the dorm," She tells the two boys.

"Chris, I'm down here!" I yell up to her, but I know my shouting isn't as loud as it usually would be. Christina looks over the railing and then back to Eric and Peter.

"What are you two doing to her?!" She screams at them, "How long has she been hanging there?"

"About five minutes," Peter answers with a shrug of his shoulders, "She's fine. We just decided that she should prove that she deserves to be here. Apparently, she's been dating our trainer and we have no proof that he wasn't showing any favoritism," Peter continues, "We just thought she should prove it by hanging here for a while. Y'know, like you did after you backed out of that fight with Molly," He says.

"You two are crazy," Christina says, "Help me get her back over. I can't do this on my own," She reaches over and I lift one of my arms up to reach her, but start to slip and grip onto the railing again.

"Chris, I'm gonna fall," I tell her, "I'm slipping. I can't hold on," I say.

"Yes, you can," She says before turning to Peter and Eric, "Help me, now!" She smacks Peter's shoulder, "If she falls it's going to be on your hands. Do you really want that guilt?" She asks. He doesn't reply. He walks toward the railing to help Christina, but is held back by Eric.

"I think she'll be fine for another minute or two," Eric says folding his arms across his chest and staring down at me. I don't really think this is about my initiation ranking anymore…or at all. I think this has more to do with Tobias and the rivalry the two of them have. But is it really worth killing me over?

"Eric, I-" Peter starts to say, but is interrupted.

"I said she'll be fine," Eric says, "You can leave if you want, but she isn't coming back over that railing until I say so. Unless she can pull herself up on her own."

"You know she can't do that," Christina says.

"Exactly," Eric replies still staring down at me.

"Chris, I can't…" I trail off as one of my hands slips off the railing. She gets down on her knees and tries to pull my hand back up, but it's too late. I am dangling by one hand now. I know that if I flail around too much and try to get my other hand back up, I'll fall.

"Tris, just hold on," Christina says, "I'm gonna go get some help," She tells me.

"No!" I exclaim, "Don't leave me," I cry, "It's too late anyway," I tell her, "I can't get back up there and I'm slipping. I'm done," I say.

"Move," Eric pushes Christina out of the way and grabs onto my hand. My hand is wet and slippery and I can't hold on. I drop again and reach out to grab onto the railing, but my hand misses and I start to freefall. I hear Christina scream and call my name as I fall into darkness.

…

I awake to a loud beeping noise. Opening my eyes I look around for the source of the noise and see an alarm clock on a nightstand beside me. And for the first time I notice that I am lying in a bed. I turn the alarm off and sit up, looking around the room. This isn't the dormitory. This is a really nice bedroom. My bed is huge. I don't know what size it is, but it could probably fit three of me in it. The sheets are white while the comforter is dark purple. There are a ton of pillows as well. Some of them are purple and some of them are white.

The carpeting is white. Two of the walls are painted a dark purple, one wall is painted white, and one is painted black. The white wall is to the left of my bed and it is completely covered in medium sized pictures with small notes underneath them. From what I can tell they are names. I assume they are the names of the people in the pictures. The black wall is directly across from my bed. It has paintball splatters all over it along with the Dauntless symbol spray painted in bright orange and my name written, graffiti style, across the whole top. There is other writing on the wall, but it's too small for me to see from where I am sitting on my bed. I don't remember doing any of this. I'm so confused right now.

There is a couch against one of the purple walls with an end table beside it and a lamp with a purple lampshade. And then against the other purple wall, the one where the door is, there is a black desk. It has some strange device sitting on it. Something that I would only see in the control room or at Erudite. Throwing the blankets off myself I stand up and walk over to the door. There are four different locks on the door. Each one with a number on it.

There is a note on the door, right at my eye level, written in my handwriting:

_**Tris, **_

_**Watch the tablet and you will get the keys.**_

What? Why would I write a note to myself? What's a tablet? Then I remember the device on the desk and walk over to the desk. There is another note on the tablet that says _'Press Play'_. There don't seem to be any buttons on this thing so I just tap the screen and sit down on the chair. A few seconds later my face appears on the screen. I am sitting in this same chair in this same room. I don't look like myself, though. I look older, somehow.

"_Good morning, it's me, Tris,"_ The video me starts talking, _"Or should I say you…or us? I know. Weird, right?" _She continues_, "Okay, um…I am going to throw a lot of crazy stuff at you right now. But don't panic, you're okay. You're healthy. Well, physically. Alright, uh, here it goes. Ready?" _I really don't know if I'm ready. I seem nervous in the video so why wouldn't I be now?_ "There was an incident four years ago and you have lost your ability to retain your short term memory. We remember everything up until the accident, but everything after that is…gone. So, it is very important that we make these 'Wake Up' videos for ourselves at the end of every day. These videos are our memories. They tell us what we need to know about the previous day. We've been recording them for almost four years. They are all on here if you want to take a look at the others," _I can't believe I live my life this way_, "Oh, before I go on, you have a doctor's appointment with Dr. Archard at 11:30 this morning. Someone will take you to the Erudite Headquarters for your appointment," _She says. I have no idea who Dr. Archard is. That name is not familiar to me at all_, "She is trying to help us with this short term memory thing. Anyway, I think that's it. You are ready to start your day. The keys to the door are in the box under the bed and remember to record before you go to bed tonight."_

The screen goes black and I stand up from the chair. I walk over to the white wall where all of the pictures are hanging. I have a feeling this is something significant; something I need to know before I walk out that door into a world I have completely forgotten.

All of the pictures are color coded and labeled. The top part is labeled _'Friends'_ then there is _'Family'_ and then _'Other'_. This is not my handwriting. Someone else did this for me.

I look at _'Friends'_, which is coded in blue and see 10 pictures. I don't know if these are in any specific order, but Christina is the first picture, then Four, then Will, Uriah, Marlene, Lynn, Zeke, Lauren, Shauna, and Tori. Tori looks older than all of the others. She seems to be somewhere in her thirties.

They all look kind of familiar. Christina and Four more so than the others. I assume that means I spent more time with them?

As I study Four's picture I notice something different about the paper his name is written on. It isn't taped down like the rest of them. I reach out for the small piece of paper and see that there is something written on the other side of it. The name _'Tobias' _is written in completely different handwriting than mine or this other person who made this chart for me. Why would they write one name on one side and a different one on the other side? I hate this short term memory thing.

I move my eyes down further to look at the pictures under _'Family'_. There are only three. Natalie (Mom), Andrew (Dad), and Caleb (Brother). I don't bother looking down at the _'Other'_. If I really cared about the _'Other' _they would be under my friends, wouldn't they?

I sit down on my bed and try to take all of this in. It isn't working. I figure I might as well get out there. I find a closet, which contains a dresser as well. Searching through my clothes I find something to wear and change. I change into a pair of black, studded, skinny jeans and a black, double layer, sweater. I put on some makeup before slipping on a pair of black, studded, boots and getting the key box from under my bed. They are all on a chain and each one has a number matching the locks on the door. I walk over to the door and take a deep breath before hesitantly unlocking each lock. After I have unlocked the last lock I open the door and step out of my bedroom ready to start my day.

…

**New story. This chapter is just kind of setting things up for future chapters so sorry if it's kind of boring. **

**Please review and let me know if you like it and would like me to continue!**

**~Thanks**


	2. Chapter 2

**Tris**

I walk out of my bedroom into a living room, which is painted black and white with a black, 'L' shaped, sofa against one wall and a glass coffee table in the middle. At either end of the couch are two glass tables with white lamps sitting on them. A large, flat screen, TV is mounted on the wall across from the couch.

Down the hall there are two other doors. One of them is open; the bathroom. And the other is closed. There is a dividing wall between the kitchen and the living room and when I walk into the kitchen I see someone looking through the refrigerator. She, like me, is wearing black jeans. But instead of a black shirt she is wearing a maroon colored tank and she has a pair of black combat boots on her feet.

My boots make a 'clicking' sound on the wooden floor in the kitchen and the girl looks over at me from behind the door of the fridge. I recognize her from the chart thing on the wall in my room.

"Hey, Tris," Christina greets as I sit down at the small nook in the corner of the kitchen.

"Hey, Chris," I reply and she gives me a strange look. It's a cross between confusion and excitement, "What?" I ask when she doesn't say anything after at least a minute.

"You called me 'Chris'," She says, "You haven't done that in a long time," She tells me.

"Oh. Okay," I respond not really knowing what else to say, "So, that's a good thing?"

"Yeah," She says, "I mean, if you remembered calling me that then that means you're remembering things, right?" She asks.

"I guess," I say, "I wouldn't really know," I continue, "Uh, I have an appointment with Dr. Archard in two hours and someone is supposed to take me to Erudite Headquarters," I say, "I'm not sure who is taking me, though," I inform her.

"I think Four is taking you today," She tells me, "He doesn't have to work so, yeah," She says quickly, "But I have to be to work in about," She looks at the clock on the stove, "Ten minutes. Okay, I guess I'm not eating breakfast. I'll see you when I get home from work," She tells me before hugging me. She grabs her purse off the kitchen counter and walks out the front door.

About 30 minutes after Christina left for work there is a knock at the door. I walk over and open the door to see Four; or Tobias. I don't know what he would rather be called. I mean, one name was out so everyone could see it and the other was hidden. I guess I'll find out soon.

"Hey," He sounds hesitant as he continues to speak, "Uh, I thought that, maybe, you would want to go out and get some food before your appointment," He goes on, "But…uh…we can just stay here and eat if you want. It's up to you," I can't help but smile at his awkwardness as he rubs the back of his neck.

"Why are you so nervous?" I laugh quietly, "I think I'm the one who should be nervous here. I'm the one who doesn't know anything; or anyone," Tears sting my eyes as I say this and look down at the floor. I laugh it off and look back up at him, "We can go out somewhere. I don't really feel like making anything, anyway," I tell him, "Let's go," I say.

"Do you have your keys?" He asks. I don't answer. I just give him a confused look, "They're hanging up in the kitchen, by the sink," He tells me and I can't help but wonder how he knows this. I walk into the kitchen and find the keys exactly where he said they were and walk back over to him, "What about your jacket?" He says.

"I don't need it," I reply, "I have this sweater. It's warm," I tell him, "And if I get cold I'll just steal your jacket," I say smiling up at him.

"Come on," He says and opens the door. We walk out and I lock the door behind us. As we start walking I grab onto Tobias's (I think that's what I'm going to call him. It sounds better than Four) arm. For some reason I feel safe with him. I feel safer with him than I've ever felt with anyone. He looks down at me, but he doesn't say anything; he just lets me hold onto his arm as we walk through different pathways.

We start walking over a deep cavern type thing with a railing and there is a river below us. I immediately start to tense up. My grip on Tobias's arm tightens and he leans his head down and starts whispering in my ear.

"You're okay," He says quietly, "Just keep walking. You're gonna be fine," We start walking faster and when we are finally away from the stupid thing, which seems like it took forever, Tobias presses his lips to my forehead, "You okay?" He asks, his lips brushing against my forehead. I nod.

"Yeah," I say, "Can we just go?" I ask.

"We can do whatever you want," He responds, "Where do you want to go?" He asks.

"I don't care," I reply, "Away from here. I don't like this spot," I tell him.

"I know you don't. I don't either," He says and starts walking again. And again I grab onto his arm as he leads me to a small restaurant so we can eat before going to Erudite.

…

After we eat Tobias and I walk to the train tracks. Tobias hops onto the speeding train before helping me on. I remember being able to get onto the train perfectly fine on my own, but now I have a hard time doing it and I don't know why. It's not like I don't remember how. It's pretty straight forward. Maybe I just don't run fast enough anymore. Tobias said that I will get back to myself soon. I'm not exactly sure what that means, but I really hope he's right. I really want to remember everything. Maybe Erudite is making some serum to help bring my memory back. That would be amazing. I know that they have developed a lot of other serums. Why not a serum for restoring memories?

I am snapped out of my thoughts when I hear Tobias's voice, "We have to jump now," He tells me, "I can't really help you with that," He says.

"Jump?" He nods, "Okay," I nod, "Are you gonna jump with me?" I ask him.

"Well, yeah, I have to get off the train too," He says.

"No, I mean will you jump with me at the same time?" I ask.

"What, are you scared?" He asks playfully.

"Kind of," I say, "I am about to jump off of a moving train," I remind him.

"Tris, you've done this a million times," He says, "You do it every day," He tells me.

"Really?" I reply and he nods with a sad look on his face.

"You have to go see your doctor every day. You've been doing this every day for almost four years now," He tells me. I am about to respond, but he cuts me off, "We really need to jump now. I'll jump with you," He says.

The two of us jump off the train and Tobias helps me up from the ground when I land on my back after rolling a couple times. He, however, landed perfectly fine. I dust myself off and we start to walk to Erudite Headquarters. Why we have to go all the way to Erudite, I have no idea. Well, I guess because there are no therapists at Dauntless. And if there were, they probably wouldn't be very helpful. We aren't taught much, other than fighting over there.

Tobias and I stick out, our Dauntless black clothing contrasting with the Erudite and their blue suits. We walk to, what seems to be, the main building. When we get there I follow Tobias up a flight of stairs and a long corridor until we reach a large room. It is painted white and there is a large desk in the center and chairs spread evenly throughout the room. There is a woman sitting behind the desk and she looks up as I we walk in. She greets us and says tells us that Dr. Archard will be ready for me soon.

We sit down beside each other and I lay my head on Tobias's shoulder. I quickly lift it back up, "Sorry," I reply, "I just…sorry," I apologize. I sit up and fold my hands in my lap.

"You're fine," He says and sets his large hand on my folded ones. I open my hands and we entwine our fingers. I look over at him while he just stares down at our hands. He has a pensive look on his face, but he looks sad as well and I don't understand why.

"Are you okay?" I ask and he looks up at me.

"Yeah, I'm fine," He says, though I can tell he isn't. He looks distressed and sort of like he could burst into tears at any second. He doesn't seem like someone who cries much. It's kind of unsettling to see him look this way.

"Tris," I hear my name being called from across the room just as I am about to respond. I look over and see a woman who looks to be a few years older than me. She is wearing a blue pencil skirt with a blue blazer and white shirt underneath.

"Go on," Tobias says, "I'll be here when you're finished," He tells me. He kissed my hand before letting go of me. He nods in the direction of the woman and I make my way over to her, looking back at Tobias at least five times before I actually make it over to her.

…

My therapy session was extremely long-and boring. I have no idea how I sit through that every day. All she did was ask me question after question, just trying to see if I have remembered anything. I haven't. When I walk out of the room Tobias is sitting exactly where he had been when I walked into the room, an hour ago. As far as I can tell he hasn't moved. I mean, he could have and then come back before my session was over.

"You ready to go?" He asks when he notices me walk over to him. I nod and he stands up from his seat.

"Did you just sit there that whole time?" I ask as we walk out of the building, "Weren't you bored? I would be bored. I was bored," I tell him.

"It was fine," He says, "I'm used to it by now," He tells me.

"Well, you shouldn't have to be," I tell him, "It's not like you're responsible for me or anything," I say.

"But I am," He says, "Or I feel like I am," There is a pause before he speaks again, "This whole thing happened because of me, because some asshole hates me hates me so much that he has to take it out on my girlfriend," He says.

"Girlfriend?" I stop and look up at him. I hear him curse under his breath and he looks down at the ground, avoiding my gaze, "Tobias," His head snaps up when I say his name, "What are you talking about?" I ask.

"I wasn't supposed to say that," He tells me, "You're supposed to remember on your own. I don't really know why it matters. You won't remember tomorrow anyway," He says. I feel like I've been slapped in in the face. It's not my fault that I can't remember; or maybe it is. I can't remember. I'm gonna have to go back and watch the other videos on my tablet thing.

"Yeah," I reply playing with the bracelet around my wrist. It is braided black leather with two, overlapping, diamond hearts, "I guess I won't," I say and begin walking again.

"Tris, I didn't mean it like that," Tobias says, "It's just hard spending every day with the person you love more than anything in the world and she doesn't even remember you. And then you have to do it all over again the next day and the next day just hoping that it might just be the day that she finally does remember you. But it hasn't happened yet."

"And you don't think it's hard for me?" I retort, "I wake up every morning to a room I don't recognize and I'm locked inside until I watch a video, which I have to record every night, just to remember the events of the day before," I say, "And then I get the keys to unlock the four locks on my door," I go on, "And I know right now where the keys go. They go in a stupid box under my bed. But I won't remember that when I wake up in the morning. It's such a trivial thing, but I have to make a video just to know how to get out of my bedroom," I conclude.

"I know, I'm sorry," He apologizes, "I shouldn't have said anything," He takes my small hands in his large ones, "You seem different today, though," He tells me.

"How?" I ask.

"Well, for one, you called me 'Tobias', which is something you don't do a lot," He says. "You used to, but not since the incident," He continues, "And you really aren't an affectionate person most of the time, but you've been holding onto me all day," He squeezes my hands gently as if to emphasize his point.

"Oh. Sorry," I reply, "I just…I don't know," I shrug.

"It's not a bad thing," He tells me, "I don't mind it at all. Maybe this means you're starting to remember something," He says, "Or maybe your brain just starting to work differently. And if that means getting rid of this short term memory loss shit, I'm fine with it," He says, "Just don't change too much."

"Well, I don't even know what I'm usually like, but I'll try not to change too much," I tell him.

"Good," He responds, "Now, we have a train to catch in about ten minutes," He says, "If we miss it we'll be walking back to Dauntless and that's a pretty long walk."

It takes us about eight minutes to walk to the train tracks. I'm sure if Tobias was walking on his own he would have been there five minutes ago, but I guess I'm a terribly slow walker and held him back. He didn't seem bothered by it at all, though. And, once again, as the train speeds by, Tobias has to pull me up. Once I am securely on the train I walk over and sit against the wall of the car.

"Can you tell me something?" I ask. Tobias walks over and slides down the wall to sit down beside me. He doesn't say anything. He just waits for me to continue, "Can you tell me what happened? I asked my therapist, but she wouldn't tell me."

"Well, if she wouldn't tell you, then I probably shouldn't either," He says.

"Please?" I ask, "You said it was your fault and I want to know why you think that," I tell him. He sighs heavily before speaking.

"You fell into the chasm back at the Dauntless compound," He says, "Eric and Peter dropped you over the railing and made you hang there for…I don't know how long. When they tried to get you back over the railing after Christina found you, you slipped and fell," He tells me, "You were in a coma for three months and when you woke up you didn't remember anything."

"Oh," I don't really know what else to say.

"According to the doctor, you remember everything up until the accident, but nothing else," He continues, "But you don't seem to remember much from before the accident either."

"That's really all I wanted to know for now," I tell him, "I have a lot of stuff recorded on my tablet that I can go back and watch," I say.

"We have to jump again," Tobias says looking out the door as we get closer to the Dauntless compound.

"Oh, yay," I say sarcastically.

**Sorry it took so long for the update and that this chapter ended at a weird spot. I don't know when I'll be able to update again. Hopefully soon. **

**Please review and let me know what you think!**

**~Thanks.**


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